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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

How To Stay Happy When Bad Stuff Happens

Is it possible to stay happy when it all kicks off?
Can you remain positive and think happy things immediately after an argument?
How can you stay happy when bad stuff happens?
Trying to stay positive even when not so good stuff is happening, appears like a massive challenge. It's actually easier than you think, but its likely that you've just never practiced it before and therefore it will be new to you to begin with.
First of all, after you've had an argument with someone you've allowed your vibration (mood) to significantly drop then you will no longer have access to happy, bright and loving emotions and feelings. Pretending that all is well and that nothing happened isn't going to do you any favors.
When you feel bad, you can't hide it from the universe which listens to your vibration and not your words or thoughts. Trying to do so is futile. Instead, the way to stay happy even when something bad has happened is to work your way up your emotional scale gradually.
Let's say you've just had an argument with your mother. You feel miserable because she isn't listening to you and she wants you to do something that you have no interest in doing what-so-ever. Instead of going off in a huff and thinking about it continuously for the next couple of days, take a moment to stop in the moment and take a few deep breaths. After stopping for a moment you can now begin to work your way up your emotional ladder.
The idea is that you want to poke around in your mind and find a thought that feels better than what you were just thinking. That does not mean you are looking for "I'm so happy and I love everything" type of thoughts. You just won't have access to them, so don't even try and fake it.
Here's an example.
"I feel miserable because my mother wants me to do something I don't want to do"
Poke around and find a better thought... Here's what you might come up with next:
"I don't have to do it if I don't want to"
Now, does this thought feel better than the original one? If it does, then you've just made massive headway already. Although its only a subtle difference, you're actually feeling a little bit better than you were doing a few moments before playing this game.
The idea is to continue on with this game until you're in a happy place. Regardless of how long you think this game will take to get you into a happier place, I can assure you that with just a little bit of effort, you'll be feeling TONS better than you did if you weren't to play the game.
Let's continue with our example...
"I'm glad I can make my own decisions and have the freedom to do so"
"Although I don't agree with what she wants me to do, she was doing it for my benefit"
"Thank God I don't live with her anymore!"
Can you see how we're gradually working our way out of where we were before and stepping into a much better place. What you'll find is that as you move up your emotional ladder you will no longer have access to those miserable thoughts that you had when you started, instead you will have access to the thoughts that you've immediately been thinking.
Whilst playing this game you may also notice that you'll get thoughts that try to bring you down your emotional ladder. Instead of giving them your attention, continue to poke around in your mind to find thoughts that feel better. Take your attention away from those thoughts that don't serve you and put your attention on ones that do.

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